Last week I talked about love and sex.  Ahuva http://ahuva18.wordpress.com/  today adds fantasy into the mix.  I’m actually a bit amazed at how few people want to talk about it.  With the prevelance of sex in Sl you’d think it would be a lot more popular.

So here we are.  There are avatars all over SL right now engaging in some form of intimacy.  Be it cybering, poseball/Xcite pixel bashing or simply cuddling somewhere private and chatting.  So I have to ask… Is this a game?  If your here for the fantasy part of this, the part where you can do things you’d never do in RL then is SL a game to you or is it real?

Now I hear lots of people say *it’s not a game* but how many really believe it.  Are you your avatar and vice versa?  Is your Avatar and extension of yourself and you an extension of your avatar?

Personally, SL is not a game.  It’s not a fantasy for me either.  Although I’ve done many things I’d never do in RL.  And in that respect there is a bit of a *game* feeling.  The fantasy that I can do what I won’t do in RL.  But that’s limited to simply the doing of something.  When it comes to my relationships with other Avatars and their humans, it stops being a game.

If you’ve ever had a relationship in SL and had it fall apart then you’ll know it’s not a game.  The feelings are real.  The pain is real.  The joy is also real.  The love is real.   So, no, it’s not a game.

I’ve seen relationships fall apart and others grow and flourish.  I’ve seen friends turn to lovers, then to partners then to marriage.  In both SL and RL.  I know it happens.  Only those people really know the nature of  their relationship in SL.  Whether it was all sex or something else entirely.  Something more than just sex.

Is there a line you won’t cross?  Is there someone you’ve had a crush on but would NEVER do anything about?  When do say "No, I won’t cross that line".  Or do you say no? 

I’ve come across a couple situations this week that have me wondering what I would or should do.

If you find out someone you’ve known for while is underage do you report them?  It’s against the TOS to be under 18 and on the main grid.  Yet we know there are a lot of *kids* on the main grid that never get reported.  Should your friendship or the TOS dictate what you do?   Honestly, I don’t know.  Rules are made for a reason.  Not only to protect the lab but to protect the residents as well.  Do you trash a friendship because someone crossed a line that they shouldn’t have?

If you’ve caught someone in a lie do you call them on it?  If you do and they deny it but you have proof, what do you do then?  Can you stay friends with someone who can lie so easily?  Can you stay friends with someone who you know is doing it just for attention? 

When do you cross the line between friends and more than friends?  Can you? Should you?  If you cross that line the relationship forever changes.  For better or worse what you had is gone.  Is it worth it?  It’s a question of what’s more important, the friendship you have, or what you may have romantically.

One last idea to ponder, do you have a secret crush?  Someone no one knows about?  Someone you fantasize about?  Would you tell them?