Ok, so I’m a day late starting this but I’m sure you’ll all forgive me.  I’ll even do 2 posts to day to make up for it.

I didn’t do this last year and wished I had so I’m going to participate this year.  Perhaps I’ll keep up blogging again after doing this.  So, go here and check it out.  Yesterday’s question which I missed was:

"How long have you been a blogger? How has it enriched your life?"
I’ve been blogging about a year I guess now, maybe a year and a half.  I’ve certainly not been regular about it.  Though for awhile, I wrote something every day.  You do start to run out of topics though.  I’m not a fashion blog so I’m usually just writing about stuff that happens to me in SL.  I’ll stick my nose in to some topics if I think I have something to say. 

Has blogging enriched my life?  That’s kinda tough.  Sometimes I think it has, others I think it’s just another thing I don’t have time for.  When I was writing daily I felt like I was contributing in some small way.  I had a few loyal readers with an occasional spike any time the word ’sex’ showed up.  I haven’t been writing daily and really miss it so this is a great way to  jump start back into it.

If I get a few new readers that’s awesome, and thank you and Welcome to my little corner of the world. ^^ 

Cheers!

oh…. don’t tell anyone but I’m doing this from work and while I can’t read blogs unless they are in my newsfeed or leave a comment, I can write in mine.  Go figure.  So I will leave a comment on Alicia’s blog later when I get home and aren’t behind the great firewall I sit behind everyday.

Every couple of months a new topic, or one revisited, comes up that gets blogged and sends everyone into fits.  The most recent is again the Great Debate on Freebies.  Prad stirred the pot quite a bit with his post, Entitlement and loads of other bloggers have commented or written on their own blogs about it.  I’m not gonna debate the worthiness of freebies with anyone.  They have their place and use and if someone works really hard at making something and then decides to just give it away…. Well who am I to tell them they can’t or shouldn’t? 

There are many things in the SL economy that annoy me to no end but I’m not going to waste a lot of time complaining to the internet about it.  I stopped doing hunts ages ago.  If my friends are doing one and want company, sure I’ll hop my way around with them but I don’t feel compelled to continue.  I have to say though, I’ve found a few new favorite stores through these things so they aren’t all bad.  But saying that, I won’t waste hours and  hours going to hundreds of stores for stuff that I may or may not end up keeping.  Just as an aside, a list of all the participating stores in a hunt would be great because even if I don’t go on the hunt, I can always visit these stores later when they aren’t as crowded and can do some serious shopping.  Just sayin…

The problem isn’t the freebie in my mind.  The problem is the people.  The consumers who have gotten so engrossed in the ‘hunts’ that they have forgotten that these are actually stores, not just buildings holding a hunt a gift that you have to find.  The designers in an effort to improve sales or traffic or both keeping improving the free gift they give out or join more hunts.  The quality of some of the free gifts I’ve seen is just stellar so kudos to all of you for the higher standards you’ve set.  But when your freebies are so damn good, I don’t need to buy anything!  Then there are the bloggers.  I use the fashion blogs just like everyone else to see what’s new and for ideas.  No, I don’t like seeing something on every single blog and usually those items i’ll avoid.  At least for a few months anyway.   The point I’m making here is that we ALL have contributed to this feeling of "Entitlement" as Prad puts it. 

For me, freebies taught me how to build.  I took things apart, figured out how they were done and then tried to duplicate them.  Once I realized I could make a copy, well then I had to make my ‘own’.  I don’t have a store and I don’t sell anything on Xstreet but I do know how to make some stuff.  Clothing and shoes and hair escape me mainly because of the amount of photoshop time and patience and frankly skill needed that I just don’t have right now.  Right now I’m focusing on making some animations for myself.  When I’m happy with them, maybe I’ll sell them or give some away, who knows.  The fact is I learned how to do things by pulling other peoples work apart and seeing what made it work or how it was put together.  I also spent hours watching Prad build and learned sooo much from him, seeing how he puts something together.  So, the freebie served a purpose for me.

All that being said, I’ll still grab a freebie that I see that is amazing or that I just simply have to have.  To be honest though, I’d pay for these items if they weren’t free. 

Instead of everyone getting angry with each other, designer and consumer alike, or attempting to point fingers or throw the blame around, why don’t you all start the designers consortium as someone suggested in Prad’s comments.  Get together and talk about how to increase business or traffic or marketing or PR.  Talk this stuff out together, ask your customers what they think, work together rather than against each other.  Get some folks together who know how to run a successful business in SL and RL.  Come up with new ways of doing things.  This is SL, if we can fly then surely there are different ways of marketing your product.

I’ve met quite a few designers in SL and without exception they are some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.  They are also incredibly talented and busy and smart.   I’d love to see a group of them get together to sort out some of the issues with SL business. 

Look what they accomplish for RFL every year….

Imagine what they could do for the SL economy….

This may be a rather rambling post so bear with me if you choose to continue to read.  If you’d rather be on your way, have a great weekend!

First, a much overdo thank you to Prad , AGAIN, for fixing the blog.  When I moved it over to baileylongcloth.com some stuff got broken and I wasn’t in a position to fix it.  He was super tired but took the time to do it so a HUGE hug for him.  Love ya Praddles!

I have to also say welcome back to Ioh. ^^  I’m so glad your back online love, you’ve been missed.  I fully intend to monopolize all of your time this weekend!  Love you.

Ari, Welcome back to DJing hon!  It was great to hear you the other night.  I know we don’t get to see each other much in world lately but I’m always be here for  you.

I’ve been building again lately.  A new house and all the furniture this time.  It’s been a lot of fun to do this one.  It’s different from anything i’ve done before.  I’ll post some pics to Flickr this weekend.  I have a lot of detail work to finish up this weekend but I wanted to get it down on the ground so I could enjoy it.  And now that Ioh is back online, ‘we’ can enjoy it.  Once the house it done I’ll go back to working on tails and ears.  I’ve sketched some ideas and made a few notes so we’ll see how that goes.  If you have any ideas for some custom ears/tails you would like to see, let me know!

I wrote a post awhile ago about perceptions.  It was based on a conversation I’d had with someone the night before.  What struck me in that conversation, and the reason for the post was how wrong I was in my perceptions of her.  I’m not going to say her perceptions of me were wrong, because they were hers, not mine.  We all have perceptions of people that are either based on what we see, what we’re told, our own interactions with them or finally on who we are ourselves.  So, I wrote the post and asked for comments as I always do.  I’ve been a bit surprised at the comments.   I’m not going to link to the post, if you want to read it, it won’t be hard for you to find. 

After reading the most recent comments last night I was… hurt, angry, confused, and felt like I’d been hit by a truck.   I was really surprised by what I’d read.  Perhaps I’m naive.  I think I’m a good person.  Yes, I have my faults, we all do but the bottom line, I’m a good person.  That’s the simple fact of it, I am a good person and when someone tells me they are my friend, well I take that for truth.  Apparently, I was wrong.  So, while my initial reaction was to reply to the comments, I decided not to.

Then I read Ahuva’s comment this morning and smiled.  Thank you Ahuva for the kind words.  Belive me, I don’t know everything!  I do know the panic though when you’ve deleted half the house or changed the textures or moved something and can no longer find it.  I remember the folks who helped me back then.  It’s my turn to share what I know and help where I can.  Not to mention I love doing it.  So IM me whenever you want.  I’m never to busy for my friends.

While I do care what people think of me and how I’m perceived I’ve realized that my friends are my friends and they’ve accepted who I am and love me regardless of my faults. 

I won’t censor my blog or the comments.  Comments are always welcome all I really ask is that they are on track with the blog post itself.  If your in doubt or would prefer to comment to me directly, just email me.  I honestly don’t bite, much.

Have a great weekend everyone!

If you think things look different around here you’re right.  Theme change happened last night.

A few other changes as well… the site has moved.  It’s now www.baileylongcloth.com   .  Well it’s my personal blog so that only makes sense right?  And since I moved it, time to change the look.  And just to really confuse you all, change the email address too.  Leave a comment if you want the address and I’ll send you some mail.

It’s a new beginning for the blog.  I’m going to try to write more often.  Mostly I’ll be writing about SL, may even post some pictures. 

So, there ya go.  New theme for the blog, new address.  Drop me a comment and let me know what you think.

Time rolls on, people change, circumstances change.  What was once important to someone no longer is and it’s replaced by something else.  Friendships made change and evolve in time. 

I’ve seen a lot of changes in the past few months, some wonderful, some just odd and some that make me sad for the way things were.

I think the hardest change to deal with have been the people who have disappeared.  People change yes.  Priorities change yes.  Commitments are made and taken back, promises made and broken.  Bonds formed and wiped out.  It happens, I know that.  It doesn’t mean I have to like it.  If someone I’ve known for 2 years suddenly disappears without another word, I’m going to be sad.  Especially when I’ve been there for them when no one else was.  I end up asking if my friendship meant so little to them.

Why don’t I contact them you ask?  Well yeah, I could.  But when you realize every communication with them was started by you… yeah you realize they obviously DON’T want to hear from you.  So you start to wonder what you’ve done when you realize so many people you thought were friends are gone. 

It’s then that you decide that it’s time for a change and a change you find.  You find someone you love who loves you.  You find a new group of friends who are happy to have you around, and new activities which you are totally enjoying. 

So, what’s wrong with all of this?  Maybe I’m too sentimental but I don’t like losing people who were close to me.  One thing I realized however, I can’t keep blaming myself for not having spoken to or seen them.  The lines of communication go both ways.  If they had wanted to hear from me, or were curious about what I was doing, I would have heard from them.  I can’t continue to beat myself up.  I’m busy too.  I have feelings too.  So I’ll just close those chapters and move on….

I’ve seen sims that were beautiful and strange disappear leaving us with only our pictures and memories.  I miss some of these places.  They gave me a sense of peace whenever I’d visit to take pics or to simply just wander around enjoying the beauty of them.  Some disappeared before I ever had a chance to see them and now I have to be content with the flickr streams of others.  My own sim, BaileysReach is gone.  I thought I’d miss it but I don’t.  Being up there on that island made me too isolated.  I like people, I like to be around people.  Sitting on that big sim alone made me lonely so I rarely was there.  So I moved back on to Angel Square.

Speaking of Angel Square… I’ve had the pleasure of owning the sim for over a year now.  I don’t regret buying the sim for a minute.  Oh I regret certain things that were done in the beginning but buying the island… never.  I think it’s time to celebrate this.  I’m going to be making some changes to the blog (I hope) and the sim in the next couple of months so stay tuned….

To those who know me well, they’ll know that my avie has gone thru quite a few changes in the last couple of months.  The most notable of this is she’s completely neko now.  Not just part time, all the time.  She’s also sporting a lovely leopard skin.

The reasons for making these changes isn’t really the point of this post.  The fact remains that this is who Bailey is.  Now last night I was out shopping with a friend.  This friend happens to be a child av and that child av is my daughter.  The person behind the av is a good friend and I am old enough to be her mother!

The point of all of this was a couple comments directed toward me in IM.  I’ve also heard a number of comments from other people about child avs.  Course I’ve heard loads of comments about nekos in general, Gor slaves, kid avies, furries etc etc  These comments range from the bland to vile things I’d never repeat.

Hearing these comments disappoints me.  This is second life, a place where you can be anyone and anything you wish to be.  Shouldn’t everyone else be able to do the same?  What does it matter to you if I’m out shopping with my daughter?  I’m not asking you to recognize her as my daughter, I’m not even asking you to say hello.  Ignore us if it makes you feel better.   The same would be said for all the others I mentioned above. 

If your out shopping and you see a Gor slave kneeling half naked or a furry, or a vampire or any of the others I’ve mentioned above and you don’t like it, ignore it.  They aren’t asking for you to interact with them.  They are simply there to shop just like you.  Don’t stare, don’t grimace and don’t run to AR them.  Leave them alone, let them shop in peace.  No one is asking you to interact with someone  you don’t wish to. 

I will say though, it’s still polite to say "I’m sorry" when you body slam someone trying to get in the store.

So yeah, I’m disappointed in some of my fellow residents.  Who knew that when we logged in to SL to escape the crap in RL we’d let all that bigotry, hate, and intolerance in.

The next time I’m out shopping with my daughter or son and someone makes a comment, I’m going to ignore them.  I’m not going to waste a moment of my time acknowledging them and their small minds.

The next time your out shopping and you see a Gor slave/master think abou this before you comment, would you tell a neko to take off their tail and ears before going shopping?  Does the fairy or angel need to take her wings off?  Are you going to tell that Vampire , sorry put the teeth away?  What about the robot , can’t even imagine what problem anyone would have with a robot.

Stop being judgmental against someone because you neither understand why they do what they do nor approve of it.  It’s not up to you to like it, or approve it.  They are entitled to live their own second lives as they see fit.

*end rant*

UPDATE:  I’ve closed comments on this post and I will no longer allow comments on this blog that do not stay on track with the message delivered in the post.

If you aren’t familiar with the poem by Robert Frost  I suggest reading it.  It’s really one of my favorite poems.  When I first logged in to SL, SL was the road not taken and as the last line in the poem says, *And I took the one less traveled by and it has made all the difference.*  For me SL was an unknown.  I saw it on TV and thought it looked cool so I logged in.  I picked up the basics of movement, flying, talking and changing my appearance fairly quickly.  I didn’t though know anything about this place, where I could go, what I could do.  I met some great people in the Welcome area who took me out shopping or dancing or just out for a wander but no one told me or even showed me that I could *DO* anything.  I had no idea that everything I saw was created by residents.  I had no idea that I had the same tools at my disposal that they did.  Perhaps I was just not paying attention.  Perhaps I wasn’t interested.  When I think back to those first few months, my focus was on people.  Meeting people.  People from all over the world that I would never have had a chance to meet or speak to otherwise.

Aribeth, my first and dearest friend, introduced me to a whole different world within this crazy world.  We crashed a wedding.  The after party was at the Three Lions Pub.  That one event sparked a year of making new friends, learning new things, exploring, love, loss, laughter, sadness, heartbreak, anger and above it all a sense of happiness and belonging.  These people came to be my family.  Many of them are gone or have wandered off on to other things but the ones I grew the closest too I still see and speak to every day.  They are family.

The Three Lions is gone but not forgotten.  In it’s place grew several pubs/bars/clubs.  A few remain and are still going strong.  New friends are made.  New memories made.  New experiences, trying new things.  We change, we grow, we learn and we are better for it.

I get IMs from people many times in world saying *I’m bored*.  Usually when I get these I’m at my busiest.  Either building something or DJing or talking to a resident.  Now there are times I log in and either don’t know what to do with myself or no one is around to talk to and I’ll feel *bored*.  That’s when I’ll either go look for places to take pictures, go shopping or just wander or even log back into RL.  What I use to entertain myself may not work for everyone but I learned long ago that SL is what you make of it.  If you don’t venture out of your comfort zone and try something new, you will eventually get bored.  Everytime I’ve started to get bored in SL i’ve learned something new.  Photoshop, making animations, torturing prims, and learning new building techniques and perfecting the ones I have.

I own 3 sims, a bar, a club, a Homeowner’s group that is growing every day, a fairly successful blog, I’m a decent photographer ;) and I’m planning all kinds of new stuff for the coming year. 

*Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -

I took the one less traveled by, …*

I plan to take the less traveled paths.  To forge my own path.

First, thank you to everyone who stopped by the Crown last night to celebrate it’s first anniversary.  It was a spectacular party.  Ahuva posted pics on her flickr as did Natty .  The fireworks were awesome(thank you Praddles ) and I totally enjoyed DJing for all of you.

Second, please don’t forget to send me your stories and pics from the past year.  Creating a book of memories from the last year is for all of us.  We’ve said it often enough, the people make the place and you are our family(twisted and deranged, but family none the less  lol ).  Only fair to have a family album. 

We’re having a black and white ball on Sunday.  Not sure what time, probably around noonish SLT.  So get your fancy duds on and come down to the Crown.  One of the fantastic Crown DJs will be spinning tunes so you really don’t want to miss it.