In a previous post I commented that I was going to RP mass at St Michaels in Midian on Sunday.  Unfortunately a plumbing emergency made me miss the last half of mass but I was still able to participate in the majority of it.

I may not post often during mass but that doesn’t mean I’m not paying attention, letting Eamon’s words sink in.  I’m not a big flowery poster.  I don’t always emote everything I’m thinking or feeling.  It’s just not my way.  But one thing that has come up in the past few days is a question of faith.

Faith to me is a blind acceptance of something that can’t be proven.  I question everything normally.  What I don’t question though is my faith in my friends and my faith in some higher power that is looking out for all of us.  My friends have proved time and again that they are there for me.  We may not always agree, we may fight but in the end we will make up and move on, a closer better relationship because of it.

There are a couple of old sayings, “Whenever God closes a door he opens a window” and “You never get thrown more than you can handle”.  I truly believe these.  My life has changed dramatically in the last 6 – 7 months.  Have the circumstances in my real life changed how I look at things and my reactions?  In a word, yes.  How can they not.

I was in a relationship for months that ended badly.  I don’t dispute that.  I won’t even dispute that I hold some responsibility for that.  Did I love him?  Yes.  Did I give up eventually?  Yes.  Am I proud of that?  No, but you reach a point where it’s just simply time to let it go and move on.  I did.  That was months ago.  Why it has all come up again in the last couple of weeks I don’t know but it has.  Now we all get to relive it.  I’d prefer not to.  I was there the first time.

It’s time to move on and put the past behind me. 

It’s time to have Faith that what lies ahead is better than what lies behind.

It’s time to have Faith  in myself.

Happy Groundhog Day y’all, and here’s to another 6 weeks of winter.  Groan.