Time rolls on, people change, circumstances change. What was once important to someone no longer is and it’s replaced by something else. Friendships made change and evolve in time.
I’ve seen a lot of changes in the past few months, some wonderful, some just odd and some that make me sad for the way things were.
I think the hardest change to deal with have been the people who have disappeared. People change yes. Priorities change yes. Commitments are made and taken back, promises made and broken. Bonds formed and wiped out. It happens, I know that. It doesn’t mean I have to like it. If someone I’ve known for 2 years suddenly disappears without another word, I’m going to be sad. Especially when I’ve been there for them when no one else was. I end up asking if my friendship meant so little to them.
Why don’t I contact them you ask? Well yeah, I could. But when you realize every communication with them was started by you… yeah you realize they obviously DON’T want to hear from you. So you start to wonder what you’ve done when you realize so many people you thought were friends are gone.
It’s then that you decide that it’s time for a change and a change you find. You find someone you love who loves you. You find a new group of friends who are happy to have you around, and new activities which you are totally enjoying.
So, what’s wrong with all of this? Maybe I’m too sentimental but I don’t like losing people who were close to me. One thing I realized however, I can’t keep blaming myself for not having spoken to or seen them. The lines of communication go both ways. If they had wanted to hear from me, or were curious about what I was doing, I would have heard from them. I can’t continue to beat myself up. I’m busy too. I have feelings too. So I’ll just close those chapters and move on….
I’ve seen sims that were beautiful and strange disappear leaving us with only our pictures and memories. I miss some of these places. They gave me a sense of peace whenever I’d visit to take pics or to simply just wander around enjoying the beauty of them. Some disappeared before I ever had a chance to see them and now I have to be content with the flickr streams of others. My own sim, BaileysReach is gone. I thought I’d miss it but I don’t. Being up there on that island made me too isolated. I like people, I like to be around people. Sitting on that big sim alone made me lonely so I rarely was there. So I moved back on to Angel Square.
Speaking of Angel Square… I’ve had the pleasure of owning the sim for over a year now. I don’t regret buying the sim for a minute. Oh I regret certain things that were done in the beginning but buying the island… never. I think it’s time to celebrate this. I’m going to be making some changes to the blog (I hope) and the sim in the next couple of months so stay tuned….
Tags: Angel Square, baileysreach, change, friends, reflections
Miss you Bails *hugs*
“I’m going to be making some changes to the blog (I hope) and the sim in the next couple of months so stay tuned….”
Would changing the terrain texture on Angel Square be one of these changes? The sand we have now is starting to send my eyes funny… 0.o
I think back to how much has changed over the last two years, and if you really think about it – everything has. Hardly anything is the same as to what it was early last year and in some respects this makes me a little sad – because things were pretty awesome then. But as you said, people and things change and nothing can remain the same forever.
I think it’s more a case of looking to the future now, and embracing the changes and new people that enter our Second Lives for the better. x
Sad and thought-provoking post Bailey. I approach those sorts of situations in this way:
Lives have their own direction and at times you find your direction or placement is the same as someone elses, and they end up intersecting. Then your or their lives shift (whether because of factors that can be controlled or just circumstances), and it’s harder to stay in the same spaces as the people you used to know: Your priorities no longer match, your timing is out, or you simply change so much that there’s hardly anything in common anymore. Yes it’s sad but it’s almost inevitable too – it takes a lot of work and commitment to retain friendships in the face of such constant change.
My best friend in RL just happens to have followed the same life pattern as me for the last decade: We went to the same uni, got involved in the same pass-times, got pregnant at the same time, etc. These similarities have kept us bonded to each other strongly enough that even though she’s left the country now we still try hard to stay in touch, but it’s not easy: Even when things line up nicely in that way, it still takes a lot of effort to keep the friendship alive. But it’s worth it for me, and as long as it’s worth it for her too we’ll fight to keep it alive: The fact that we both get so much out of it is key.
Changes can be hard. I’ve seen favorite sims of mine come and go as well. Quite a few of those favorite places were clubs that you could go dancing. Didn’t really need any set reason to go to them, though some would have events and prizes, but I liked the places that could facilitate a place to hang out and dance.
I see that sort of potential with the Crown and C2P. I just can’t be on SL during the times when there are events due to work.
Now, with my laptop off in the shop, there is a change that is much harder as it makes it more difficult to sync up. But even still, there is a certain direction and path I wish to take, and a certain someone I want to be on that path with. So, despite the challenge, and change in the day to day, there is something to keep focus upon in the long run.