Yep, that’s me.  I’ve been a bad blogger.  Haven’t posted a thing in days.  Why you may ask?  Well, I’ve been sick in RL and really haven’t felt like writing anything.  I’ve also been busy doing other things.  What other things?  Oh, you’ll all find out at some point.  Just not now.

Back to blogging though.  I’ve missed it actually.  One of the blogs I read had a link to this website  and the premise sounded pretty good so I went to check it out.  Of course they want you to buy the video, the book, the tapes etc etc but the basic premise I like.  Here’s the idea, stop complaining and criticizing for 21 days.  If you catch yourself doing it, then start over for 21 days.

What an incredible concept no?  No complaints, no criticisms, no gossip, no drama for 21 days.  Have you ever stopped to think about how many times you complain about something in your day?  Being home sick for three days I’ve done a lot of complaining believe me.  But I’ve been sick so I decided to not even try this until I felt better.  I’ll start this weekend.  21 days, I think I can do it.

What about you?  Can you go 21 days without a complaint about someone or something?  21 days without criticizing someone’s behavior, clothing, attitude? 21 days without talking about someone negatively?

I’d love to hear what you think about this and whether or not you think you can do it.  I’ll post everyday to let you know how I’m doing.  Yes, I’ll be honest and not cheat!  Not that most of you would know if I did but I won’t.

I challenge anyone who wants to do this with me to comment here or drop me a note/IM in world.  Most of my IMs go to email and I’ll respond when I get it.

Even if you choose to not try this little experiment with me, think about how many times you’ve complained today.  It’s only 7am for me and I’ve ripped our building maintenance apart for not sanding the parking lot or handing out ice skates.  It’s a valid complaint granted but instead of complaining, I should call them, which I did.  I won’t tell you what they told me.  It wasn’t nice.

The idea that Phillip brought up about merging the Teen and Main grid has been bantered about all over the blogosphere.  While I can appreciate both sides of the argument I think attempting this with the issues LL currently has is a mistake.

There is no doubt I’ve met some talented and very mature minors on the main grid.  I’m sure there are far more out there than I know about.  They are smart and creative and savvy enough to not broadcast their age.  They are breaking the rules yes but kudos to them for trying something.

There are 2 sides to every argument of course.  Those who support letting all the kids in to the main grid and those who don’t.  I doubt anyone is suggesting just throwing the doors open and letting anyone thru without some form of verification that you are who you say you are.  This is where some people lose me.  You are signing up for SecondLife, many have blogs, many have even referred to their RL in those blogs.  Why are you so against some sort of verification that you are who you say you are when you enter sl?  No one is entirely anonymous on the internet.  An enterprising 13yr old could hack your website, find your bank account and buyout the video store before you even notice.  I realize that’s an exaggeration but you get my point.

Now granted, some worry about handing out personal details.  Fair enough.  Look at it from a different view though.  By verifying you are protecting yourself.  Your saying, "yep, this is who I am" to LL.  Now it’s up to LL to protect that information by not sharing it, letting it get "lost" or stolen.  Perhaps I’m being nieve but at some point you’ve got to trust a system to work as it’s intended.  So, I age verified, it took 5 mins.  I have payment info on file, it took 5 mins.  LL knows who I am and so does everyone else in SL that I’ve chosen to tell.  I make no secret of it, I just *choose* who I tell.

What does all that have to do with merging the 2 grids?  It’s one of the things LL will have to do if they want teens and adults to co-exist openly.  I don’t want to have to alter what I do in SL because a kid may be on the sim.  Not when my sim is set to mature.  I don’t want to have to tell the residents of my island what they can or can’t do on their property because a kid may show up at the mall in the middle of the sim.

By the same token I’d expect there to be some strong rules about behaviour in kid friendly areas.  I’ve no problem following the rules in such an area if I can set my own on my sim.

I’ve long since thought that parents should be able to spend time with their kids in SL.  Maybe that’s the place to start integrating.  Set up a "family" area.  See how it works.  Allow family members to bring people in if they want to.  It could be a great thing.

It’ll be interesting to see how this pans out.  As Blue said in the concierge chat last night they’ve wanted to do this for 2 years.  I’ll reserve judgement for now and wait to see what happens.

So, wow been a busy few days now hasn’t it.  To say that the grid had issues this past weekend would be an understatement.  Logins were on and off more often than…. well, it was a lot.  Don’t rezz no copy items, teleports down, stale transactions and I won’t even talk about what Midian was like.

I’ve been a resident for over 2 years now.  Way back when I was still in my Ruth skin this kind of behaviour was normal.  Hair and shoes hanging off your arse, unable to walk across a sim line.  It was awful.  But it got better.  It really did.  In fact the majority of 2008 was awesome.  Crashs happen but not often.  No weird attachments.  And if the grid went down, everyone got booted(well, except Prad).  In fact every Wednesday the grid would go down, we’d all log in to RL and eventually the grid came back up and life went on.  Glitches happened of course but they usually fixed themselves in an hour or two.

This last week and especially this past weekend has been the worst I’ve seen in 2 years.  People spamming their groups to not log out because logins were disabled.  Then once you inevitably crashed, trying in vain to log back in.  To say I was annoyed would be an understatement.  I don’t usually complain about LL.  I know they are doing the best they can.  At least I hope they are.  But whatever it is that sent the grid into a tailspin this past week needs to get fixed.  And soon. 

There are a lot of us paying a great deal of money every month.  We expect excellent service and a product that works.  Glitches will happen, we get that.  But I have to say I’d rather know the grid was gonna be down for 4 hours on one day then lose 4 hours in little bits and pieces over the course of 3 days. 

As far as the buyout of Xstreetxl and Onrez…. I’ll reserve judgement until I see what they intend to do with it.

Roleplay is a big deal in SL for many residents.  There are any number of areas you can roleplay in from the many Gorean sims to the medieval Avilion to the urban dark side of Midian and Toxian City.  If you’ve got an interest in roleplay then there is a place out there for you.

Now I’ve already confessed here that I’ve started roleplaying in Midian City and that I’m really enjoying it.  I’ve been a part of this for about a week now and thought I’d share my thoughts about role playing and Midian specifically. 

First, I realize many people look down on avs who roleplay.  Honestly I don’t know why though.  Even before I started I never looked down on anyone for it.  Personally I will never understand the Gor sims but that’s just me.  To each their own and as long as you don’t expect me to "roleplay" on a non-Gor sim, we’re all good.  If I’m on a roleplay sim taking pictures, I wear an observer or OOC(out of character) tag and respect those who are roleplaying.  Out in the rest of the world, I’m just me, no character to play.

I’ve come to learn that roleplay is not as easy as one might think who has never done it.  I would compare it to writing a play as it’s being acted out.  You are reacting to the other characters you encounter and many times you don’t know exactly what they are going to do or how they are going to react. 

I started roleplaying in Midian because several of my friends have and are and it struck me one night that it would be fun.  Since I started I’ve learned quite a bit and not just about roleplaying, about myself too.  See the character I’ve created in Midian has many of the traits I have so playing her isn’t much of a departure from just being myself.  I would think that to be successful in roleplay you need to identify with your character.  Unless you are a really good actor, playing someone contrary to your natural character is going to be difficult.

So now I’m roleplaying.  I’ve lots to learn still but I’m looking forward to the process.  I’m just thankful I managed to jump from roof to roof last night without making a total arse of myself in front of Elise.

I’m certainly not the expert on roleplaying but if you never have and think you want to, I say go for it.  If you want to hang out in Midian and get a feel for things, IM me I can show you around. 

=^.^=

Apparently confessions are good for the soul so I’m going to start this week off with one of my own.  So here it is:  I always thought roleplay in SL was silly and a waste of time.

Why am I blogging this *confession*?  Well, quite  simply because I started roleplaying this weekend.  So here’s what happened…

I have quite a few friends who roleplay.  For the most part, they are all roleplaying in Midian City.  Now I’d been to Midian in the past to take a few pictures but I was always there *out of character*.  Getting involved in roleplay held no interest for me.   Thru conversations they would have I’d hear about what was going on.  I’d see the pictures they would post to their Flickr streams along with the story that went behind it.  To be perfectly honest, I was fascinated.  I’ve been riveted by the stories I’ve seen and heard. 

Now anyone who has seen me lately knows I’m back to being a Neko.  Black fluffy tail, black ears and new tats.  This was going to be the year of taking some risks and stepping out of my comfort zone.  Frankly, I’m enjoying being a cat.  So the other night I popped over to Midian to take a few pictures while my friends were over there.   While I was snapping away a bit of roleplay started and I seemed to have landed in the middle of it.  I was out of character so I just sat and watched and listened and I have to say, totally enjoyed it.    So, when I was asked if I would consider roleplaying in Midian I said sure. 

I spent a good part of the weekend in Midian.  Met quite a few people, did some roleplaying and was given an invite to be a Catwalker Pledge.  And so it begins….  I’m looking forward to this.  It’s new, it’s different and for me, it’s stepping out of that comfort zone that I’ve been way to stuck in.  I know I’ve got a lot to learn when it comes to roleplay but I’m looking forward to it and I’m looking forward to getting to know my new family, the Catwalkers.

So, if you see "Bails" in Midian don’t be too surprised.

If you aren’t familiar with the poem by Robert Frost  I suggest reading it.  It’s really one of my favorite poems.  When I first logged in to SL, SL was the road not taken and as the last line in the poem says, *And I took the one less traveled by and it has made all the difference.*  For me SL was an unknown.  I saw it on TV and thought it looked cool so I logged in.  I picked up the basics of movement, flying, talking and changing my appearance fairly quickly.  I didn’t though know anything about this place, where I could go, what I could do.  I met some great people in the Welcome area who took me out shopping or dancing or just out for a wander but no one told me or even showed me that I could *DO* anything.  I had no idea that everything I saw was created by residents.  I had no idea that I had the same tools at my disposal that they did.  Perhaps I was just not paying attention.  Perhaps I wasn’t interested.  When I think back to those first few months, my focus was on people.  Meeting people.  People from all over the world that I would never have had a chance to meet or speak to otherwise.

Aribeth, my first and dearest friend, introduced me to a whole different world within this crazy world.  We crashed a wedding.  The after party was at the Three Lions Pub.  That one event sparked a year of making new friends, learning new things, exploring, love, loss, laughter, sadness, heartbreak, anger and above it all a sense of happiness and belonging.  These people came to be my family.  Many of them are gone or have wandered off on to other things but the ones I grew the closest too I still see and speak to every day.  They are family.

The Three Lions is gone but not forgotten.  In it’s place grew several pubs/bars/clubs.  A few remain and are still going strong.  New friends are made.  New memories made.  New experiences, trying new things.  We change, we grow, we learn and we are better for it.

I get IMs from people many times in world saying *I’m bored*.  Usually when I get these I’m at my busiest.  Either building something or DJing or talking to a resident.  Now there are times I log in and either don’t know what to do with myself or no one is around to talk to and I’ll feel *bored*.  That’s when I’ll either go look for places to take pictures, go shopping or just wander or even log back into RL.  What I use to entertain myself may not work for everyone but I learned long ago that SL is what you make of it.  If you don’t venture out of your comfort zone and try something new, you will eventually get bored.  Everytime I’ve started to get bored in SL i’ve learned something new.  Photoshop, making animations, torturing prims, and learning new building techniques and perfecting the ones I have.

I own 3 sims, a bar, a club, a Homeowner’s group that is growing every day, a fairly successful blog, I’m a decent photographer ;) and I’m planning all kinds of new stuff for the coming year. 

*Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -

I took the one less traveled by, …*

I plan to take the less traveled paths.  To forge my own path.

Change is a good thing.  No really it is.  Although, i’ll be the first to admit that even though I say change is a good thing I don’t always believe it.  We have our routines, our way of doing things and when forced or pushed into making changes some of us embrace them and move on others fight it kicking and screaming.  I’m not in the latter category but I’m also not always in the former either. 

Lets face it, change can be scary.  It’s unknown.  It’s untested.  It requires risk.  It requires stepping off that ledge and hoping the safety net is under you.  Most of the time the net is there.  What do you do when it isn’t? 

What do you do when you step off the ledge and the safety net is gone, your on your own.  Fall or soar, it’s up to you.  Well obviously no one wants to fall.  We all want to soar and be successful.  Inevitably we are going to fall though and that’s why we don’t like change. 

Falling is ok though.  Why is it ok?  Because we only grow if we are willing to change.  We only change when we’re willing to accept falling.  Remember, change is a good thing.

So the next time your confronted with change, embrace it.  See it for what it is, an opportunity to grow.  Every opportunity we have to grow, to learn, to expand our experiences is something we should be looking forward to not dreading or avoiding.

Change doesn’t have to be something to fear.  Change really is a good thing.

They say some people have it and some people don’t.  I have to agree with that statement.  Some of us are simply born with inherent talents.  Be it musically, math, science, art, or writing some people are simply gifted.  In SL there is no shortage of truly gifted and talented individuals.  I could rattle off a list of names of people whose talents I admire but that doesn’t really do them justice.  Not only are these folks gifted in one way or another but they are also good people as well. 

If I simply run down my friends list there is no end to the number of people I call friends whose talents amaze me.  They inspire me daily to improve my skills.  If it wasn’t for someone near and dear to my heart I never would have tried photoshop and started taking pics.  I never would have started building if I hadn’t sat and watched others build and realize, *Hey, I can do that too!*. 

If I look around the grid I see talent everyday.  People creating hair and clothing and shoes with detail that simply amazes me.  Having worked with photoshop for several months now I know the work that goes into it and I applaud every single designer/creator on the grid.

I see the quality of some of the homes that are available to purchase and I want to move in or find someone to build me one in RL.  Every day the furniture available gets better and better.  Posing and animations have gone from static and stiff to fluid and realistic.

Have you looked at women’s hair lately?  Guys don’t tell me you don’t want to run your fingers through those lovely tresses! 

I’ve been to sims that are so beautiful and unique I don’t want to leave.  Spending hours just wandering and taking picture after picture.

I look around every day I log in and I see something different, something new something so striking I can’t tear myself away from the screen. 

Next time you log in, look around you and remember that everything you see, everything you virtually touch or interact with was created by someone.  Someone sitting at a computer just like you.  Someone who took the time to create the house you live in, the sofa you sit on, the dance animation you use, the landscaping and the store you shop in.

Next time you log in, IM or drop a notecard on just one person who made something you enjoy or created that sim you’ve spent hours at dancing or taking pics.  Believe me, they get enough complaints they’ll appreciate a word of thanks and praise.

As the saying goes, Pay it Forward.

So here we are a few days into the New Year and most of us have probably broken those resolutions we made or are putting off starting them.  The fact is, we all make choices.

We choose to log in to SL for whatever reason.  Whether it’s for the creative aspect, the social, the sex, yes the sex or to be and do things we wouldn’t do in real life.  For whatever reason you choose to be here, embrace it.  Don’t apologize for it.

Someone the other day said, *apologizing makes you sound wrong, don’t apologize*.  No truer words were spoken in my opinion.  A number of people have been talking about trying to explain SL to their friends and family in RL.  I don’t anymore.  Perhaps it’s selfish of me but SL is my escape.  I don’t really want them here.

So… choices.  We all make them.  Some are not the wisest and some are just lucky but they are ours.  You chose to log in.  You chose to purchase the land, the house, the furniture, the fab boots or the slinky dress.  No one twisted your arm and made you do it.  Don’t like what you bought?  Sorry but you chose to buy it.  Don’t go complaining to the creator/designer/vendor.  They aren’t going to return your money because you made a bad choice.

Instead of whining about something not fitting right or being lousy quality or the wrong color or the wrong fiber content just suck it up and make a better choice next time.  You chose to buy the boots without trying a demo first.  You should have tried the hair on before you bought it you know. 

I’ve got my share of *WTF was I thinking*.  I still buy stuff I end up hating but the only person I complain to is myself.  Then I file it away in the *ewwWW* folder.  I won’t apologize for the choices I’ve made.  Right or wrong, they are mine.  I have to live with them. 

So next time you go to buy something, remember your choosing to spend your lindens.  No one is making you do it.  Don’t blame the landlord, designer or creator.  Next time, make a better choice.

A new year, a time for beginnings, to wipe the slate clean and start over.  A time to reflect on the past and plan for the future.  If you want to make a change in your life what better time to do it than the start of a new year.

I don’t make resolutions anymore, I rarely follow thru on them.  A resolution is simply a formal declaration of an intention to do or not do something.  Declaring it doesn’t make it happen and unless you really want it, it’s not going to happen.

So, what do I really want for 2009…

Love, happiness, good friends, good health, a good job and to finish school

Some of this is within my control, some not.  I’m planning a lot of changes for 2009, within SL and RL.  I also learned quite a bit this year.  I learned who my friends really are, who I can trust  and that the only way to truly grow, is to open yourself up to all the possibilities.

This last one I learned very late in the year.  If you don’t open yourself up to the possibilities in life you’ll never be able to experience them.  You also risk being hurt but we all get hurt and we all live through it.

2009 for me will be a year of taking risks.  It will be a year of trying something new and getting better at what I already do.  I will start blogging regularly again.  I will be a better person and a better friend.  So even though I said I wouldn’t, I’ve made some resolutions and you are all witnesses to them.

So Happy New Year to you all.  I hope 2009 brings you all that you desire and hope for.